Mental Health: Trauma and Healing

These days, it seems to be quite popular to delve into whatever trauma it is we have been subjected to at some earlier point in our lives.

I don't say that to make light of what is a serious situation, but the psychology and mental health industry does have a way of getting entrenched in the psychological "flavor of the month" from time to time.

Trauma is a multi-layered beast, and many people never heal from theirs nor do they even seriously unpack the parts of their past that are pervasively shaping their behaviors today.

Healing is actually surprisingly elusive — even among those who are eager to heal their trauma. The problem is that we often think that we have dealt with things that are far more complex than the surface levels we examined. Someone might say "I'm over my parents' accidental death" but the traumatic event still informs virtually every choice they make, interfering with their lives and happiness.

While it is perhaps noble to want to help somebody you believe is suffering, there is not much point in offering advice to somebody who is not in the place where they're ready to receive it.

Surprisingly many people show up for counseling sessions because they were told by somebody — maybe a co-worker or family member — that they would "benefit from some counseling." But if they don't believe it, themselves, there is not much that can be done for them because they're not going to be receptive to the suggestions made.

Perhaps it sounds like a cliché but first you have to be open to the idea that you do have something that needs to be worked on.

When I say that healing can be elusive, it has to do with the fact that we're often aware of when something major and horrible happen to us, but we're not aware of the times that the horrible event was reinforced or "anchored" by subsequent actions or words from those around us.

What does that mean?

Well, you might have experienced a situation in which the people around you treat you differently after some incident... which only serves to remind you of that incident.

What's more, trauma is quite often not something caused by "an event," but rather by a long series of toxic behaviors we were exposed to over a period of months or years. We tend to ignore those as "something" because we can't identify a single horrible thing that happened.

In order for healing to follow we have to be open and trusting of a counselor or mental health professional that we can be truly vulnerable with and share some of our deepest senses of fear and potentially shame that we might have carried for decades.

While there is definitely no undoing trauma, it can be understood and processed in such a way that we can live fulfilling lives that are not dominated by reacting to a memory rather than living in the present moment.

It is definitely a challenging and at times painful process, but it is also well worth it!

I appreciate you coming by to visit my blog, and Bright Blessings to all!

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