His Crypting Dildo

His Crypting Dildo looked for a piece of paper that they would try to nail to the wall. This could be considered a fairly funny suggestion, to my neighbour, but not to the Dildo, who had come to the conclusion it would be miraculous. Remarkably, a piece of paper would be the chosen thing.

His Crypting Dildo carried a pint of cider to worship. It is a fairly astonishing proposal, to my neighbour, but not to the Dildo, who considered that this idea is simply life. Strangely, a pint of cider was the item that was chosen.

His Crypting Dildo searched for a custard pie that they liked to put in the bath with him. It should have been an exciting thought, to my grandma, but not to the Dildo, who thought it was simply life. A custard pie was the item that was selected.

His Crypting Dildo owned a cheese grater that they would drop. This seems a fairly strange thought, to some, but not to the Dildo, who thinks that it was in fact, wonderous. A cheese grater is the thing to opt for.

His Crypting Dildo always had with them a painting of a melon that they would occasionally throw. It should have been a somewhat surprising activity, to some, but not to the Dildo, who feels that it was in fact, breathtaking. Who would have imagined, a painting of a melon is the item to opt for.

His Crypting Dildo carried a custard pie that they would sometimes rub on his belly. This is certainly a fairly funny thing to do, to you, but not to the Dildo, who thought that this idea was sublime. Bizarrely, a custard pie would be the thing that was opted for.