Keeping Secrets?

I have always been slightly mystified by the whole concept of both "keeping secrets," and "telling secrets."

If somebody comes to me and says something like "can you keep a secret?" I'm immediately suspicious because they are confessing that they have a secret and they want to no longer keep it a secret.

I appreciate that sometimes secrets can feel like a heavy burden to carry around and somehow the burden becomes a little bit lighter if you share it with somebody else, but flapping lips is also one of the ways that people get into severe trouble because they end up sharing something told to them in confidence, with the wrong people. And, before you know it, the so-called secret is basically public knowledge.

As far as I'm concerned, the only true secrets are the ones you keep and never share with anybody else. I'm reminded a bit of what we sometimes see depicted in movies where somebody says "I'll take that secret to the grave with me." That's pretty much how I regard secrets, as well.

It seems to me that most secrets basically end up as gossip fodder rather than actual secrets.

Just to clarify, for the purpose of this post I am talking primarily about personal individual secrets, not so much about government or military secrets which tend to be very closely guarded, typically under threat of severe punishment if broken.

Maybe I'm a bit of a stick-in-the-mud because I'm generally unwilling to play "the game". If somebody comes to me and says "can I share a secret with you", my typical response is going to be "I'd rather you didn't." And if that doesn't work I point out that whatever they want to tell me was likely told to them in confidence and they're breaking that confidence.

That sort of response typically uncovers the sad reality that the alleged secret isn't a secret at all, and saying can you keep a secret is just a figure of speech to get someone's attention.

I guess I'm just a very literal person because I just don't like the turn those kinds of conversations take!

Thanks for stopping by and have a great remainder of your week!

How about YOU? Do you ever get asked to keep secrets? How do you feel about that? Leave a comment if you feel so inclined — share your experiences — be part of the conversation!

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Created at 2026.07.23 00:38PDT
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